What ‘Love is Blind’ Taught Us About Practicing Healthy Relationships

Good health and well being is not limited to fitness routines and eating well. Let's add some love to the mix. 

If you’re reading this, I’m sure it’s because you ate up all the drama and romance that the Netflix original “Love is Blind” has fed us since its launch this past February. For those who haven’t seen it, the show is essentially an experiment conducted to test whether you can fall in love with someone you’ve never seen. Show contestants talked to their love interests through a wall until they decided to get engaged. Only then were they revealed to one another. Sounds insane, right? Well, believe it or not, three relationships have emerged from the first season! Don’t we just love a happy ending?

While ‘Love is Blind’ gave us all the reality tv messiness that we live for (GIFs of Diamond were certainly posted up and down my Twitter timeline), it’s easy to overlook the fact that the show has taught us a lot about navigating relationship issues in a healthy way that benefits both parties. Healthy relationships have a handful of mental and physical benefits, so let’s explore each couple’s healthy practices that we can use to build healthy love lives and therefore enhance our own well being. 

Lauren and Cameron

Credit: Deadline

Good Practice: They navigated whatever small road bumps they did have with a balanced amount of patience and understanding, especially Cameron, even when Lauren was unsure about marrying him. He never met her uncertainty with hostility, which made their relationship as healthy as it was. He also did not let his pride get in the way when Lauren’s pro-Black dad explained his concerns with interracial dating; he respectfully sat, listened, and won her dad’s approval (halfway, at least).

Something to Consider:  I’m not one to put a time stamp on love but, as perfect as #Lamren is, they only knew each other for about four days before deciding to get married. They had little to no issues, though, this may have simply been a match made in heaven. Hopping into a committed relationship or marriage can be a bad idea once the puppy love wears off. Proceed with caution. 

Barnett and Amber

Credit: PopSugar

Good Practice: Amber’s healthiest practice was her commitment to remaining her authentic self. She made it clear that she intended to be a stay-at-home wife, and left it up to Barnett to decide if he wanted to take on her baggage. She also refused to suppress her personality for anyone or anything, not even in front of Barnett’s family who did not appear too fond of her when she first met them. Her loud personality seemed to clash with their reserved nature, but they warmed up nevertheless. 

Something to Consider: Shortly after their engagement, Amber revealed that she is $20K in debt, does not own a place, and is unemployed. This sharply contrasts with Barnett’s situation; he is an engineer with his own place and assets. Although this proved a non-issue since the two are now married, when merging lives with a partner, you might want to consider whether you can manage their baggage, whether it be financial, emotional, or any other type.

Giannina and Damian

Credit: TheCinemaholic

Good Practice: These two chose to build their relationship at their own pace. Though the point of the show was to leave happily married, they were not ready for that — their consistent and intense arguments over absolutely everything and nothing were dead giveaways. They decided to primarily date as boyfriend and girlfriend which was the healthiest decision possible. 

Something to consider: Giannina and Damian worked things out for themselves, but they argued the most consistently and intensely out of all of the couples on the show. It’s not easy, but remember to practice expressing concerns productively; consistently letting negative emotions (anger, jealousy, etc.) cloud the way you communicate will almost always yield a less than ideal response from your partner. 

Jessica and Mark

Credit: Life and Style Magazine

Good Practice: Mark never was jealous when Jessica talked to Barnett at group gatherings, even though he knew how strong her feelings for him once were; he trusted her, and that is arguably one of the most difficult healthy practices. He also did not let the fact that she was not fully attracted to him affect his self-view. Loving yourself when others may not is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself. Props to him!
Something to consider: If someone is treating you like a second option, boot it. We all know Jessica only chose Mark because Barnett didn’t choose her, and nobody deserves to be a backup plan. And of course, we have to discuss the 10 year age gap — Jessica only mentions it about 1000 times. Large age gaps can get very weird very quickly, but it is most important to reassure that the younger party has complete control over their decision to be in the relationship.

Diamond and Carlton

Credit: Madame Noire

Good Practice: Carlton stood in his truth and was vulnerable with Diamond when he told her that he is bisexual -- an incredibly difficult feat for him. Diamond also practiced healthy habits by being honest and admitting she needed a moment to process Carlton’s sexuality. Although things blew up the next day, their initial exchange on the matter was healthy. 
Something to consider: We can gather that Carlton still carries some of the baggage from his past experiences explaining his sexuality to women; it’s evident in his defensive response to Diamond’s concerns. Clearly, our past experiences can condition us to misinterpret the intentions of others, so remember to enter new romantic situations as neutrally as possible. Protect yourself, but don’t let the past block your blessings! 

Kelly and Kenny

Credit: Life and Style Magazine

Good Practice: Kelly refused to ignore her gut feeling. Kenny is a fantastic man (he is, in fact, very underrated in my opinion), but she said herself on the show that she just could not feel that "infatuation" with him. She refused to waste either of their time staying in a relationship that wouldn’t have satisfied her, an extremely healthy choice.

Something to consider:  Sometimes two perfectly good people don’t always make a perfect match. Just because a relationship could work out, that doesn't mean you should settle if you’re not experiencing the kind of love you want. If you want fireworks, butterflies, and “infatuation” like Kelly, then you go get that! 

What did you learn from each couple? Did any of these takeaways resonate with you? Whether practicing patience, honesty, vulnerability, or self-esteem, building a solid relationship is a challenge, but a good one, because it is a cycle of finding the healthiest ways to love and to be loved. Healthy love is medicinal — it has the same effects on your mind and body as that fitness routine you live by. Now continue doing your squats and eating your fruits and veggies, but remember to love on somebody too.